In Which Things are Looking Up

Sunday during the day was also not great - not as bad as Saturday, but I was not doing a very good job on the boat and I think Valissa was getting exasperated. I realized that I probably wasn't actually doing that much worse than usual, but that previously I'd had an unusual (for me) amount of patience with myself while I was learning something new. On Sunday I fell back on the old habit of mentally beating myself up for not knowing how to do something, or getting defensive instead of just trying to remember and learn from my mistake. Very annoying. I think it was just because of my bad-mood carry over from Saturday.

However, after work everything started to get better. I stayed in the office for a little while to use the internet (because I'm always afraid I'm going to go over the ridiculous limit here and end up owing thousands of dollars) and got to see the really sweet Dutch girl and the nice guy from England again before they left on Monday. They were both dolphin centre volunteers and were some of the last to leave.

It was a glorious day so I decided to go to the beach. The ocean here is very different than it was in Cairns, for one thing, there aren't stingers so you don't have to stay in the stupid nets. It's way way colder, and there are WAVES. The most intense waves and undertow I've ever swam in (not that I've had a lot of oceanic experience). I made sure to swim near other people, a nice man and his kids. We talked a little bit, and after they left I stayed in for a while and then lay on the beach in the fading sun and read my book. Lovely.

I ate and sat down the veg out for a bit, then Berenice texted me and invited me over. We were planning on going back to the video store because it had been a week and we had to take our movies back and get new ones. I came over and we sat and talked. Her boyfriend had his friends over and it was so weird - the boys sat in the kitchen and talked and cooked and the girls sat at the dinner table and talked. I don't know why, there was almost no crossover. It was weird. Valissa came over for a bit, which was awkward. I just don't know how to interact with her. Sometimes she is really fun and nice and great and sometimes I feel like she is sorry she said I could come help her. I like her, I just don't know how to deal with that or the stress of my project.

Then we went to the video store and I took too long picking out my movies. I'm happy with them, though. I got a nice array: girl power funny (Whip It), what Maria would call "guy humor" funny (Forgetting Sarah Marshall), 1920s British funny (Jeeves and Wooster), New Zealand funny (Flight of the Conchords), and Shakespearean funny (Twelfth Night). I trust you are sensing the theme. Then we went back to Berenice's and I got my wish: she, Perrine, and I watched a movie. It was so nice. We put a blanket down on the floor (they haven't gotten their couch yet, it's still being ordered) and had a picnic of watermelon and watched Whip It, which was an excellent movie. I had to explain a couple of words or idioms, which was fun. I've never really been in a position to do that before. It was really really nice.

Monday was my day off. I had stayed in on Saturday night because going out would have been a terrible idea, so Steph, the German girl from the hostel and I planned to hang out on Monday. I woke up, talked to Bobby and my mom and a few other people for a little while, and then went to yoga with Berenice. It's not really yoga, it's called Body Balance and is sort of like tai chi/yoga/pilates thing. It's okay, and is really good for my legs and stomach, but I really want to try real yoga ever since I did it with Katherine. Then I came home, changed, and ran to the beach to meet Steph. We lay in the sun and talked and tanned and went in the ocean a little bit, but the waves were fierce so we didn't stay in long. I read my book for a little while and fell asleep. It was lovely. I found out when I came home that the sun had been ever-so-slightly off to the side so now one side of my back and the opposite side of my front are much darker than the other sides. Oh well. I showered and changed and walked into town, thinking I had plenty of time to deposit my rent money, but it turns out that banks here close an hour earlier than they do in the states, so I got there right after it had shut. I went back and cooked and read and watched Australian TV (and American TV on Australian TV - they played Myth Busters!) and bought my plane ticket back to Cairns (May 6th, hopefully with a day stop in Perth first).

Then I decided to take Steph up on her offer to hang out with some of the people from the "other hostel". It was the other American's last night before he started his travels around the rest of Australia. We sat and talked and I realized that maybe I do not quite fit with the typical backpacker. It's not that I don't like them, because I do, they're fun. But the whole travel mentality they have is completely different. I can't do the completely free, gypsy traveler kind of thing. It sounds nice, on the outside. I mentioned to a few people that I've been homesick lately and they say that they're not, they don't want to go home. One of the older Australian guys was talking about how he had been travelling for fourteen years, seeing all of Australia because at the end of this year he was going to leave and he was never coming back. Never? I don't understand that. I love travel, and I hope that I do a great deal of it in my lifetime. It would be nice not to feel sad while I'm here, but at the same time I think it's sadder not to miss home. I will be sad to leave Australia, I really will, I love it here, but I love home too and I have friends and family and a great internship waiting for me. I can't imagine not having people and places that you are so attached to that you want to go back there. I hope I travel a great deal during my life but part of travel is having a home to come back to in between. It won't always be the same home, probably, but I love that there are people I love waiting for me, even when it makes me sad.

Today I worked in the office most of the day. I got to meet Lars! Lars is my advisor's advisor and has been off studying dolphins in Shark Bay the whole time I've been here. It was particularly exciting to meet him because I just read two of his papers and cited them in the last paper I wrote. I've never met a reference before. I felt sort of nerdily in awe and felt like I should ask for his autograph.

The itchy bites have gotten worse. I vacuumed and sprayed some more and have been sleeping on the couch, but they haven't stopped. Valissa suggested I talk to the chemist so I stopped on my way home. I showed him my arms and asked what he thought. He said it looked to him like sand fly bites. He said everyone reacts to them differently but that's what they looked like to him, and that you don't feel the sand flies land on you, often the bites don't appear and start itching until the next day. This would explain why I woke up with bites I hadn't had before, and why the bites only started last week (after the first time I went to the beach and to Big Swamp Wildlife refuge). And why the bites have kept happening - I've been going to the beach most days since this started. He said they could take up to a week to heal and said that the flies would not have come home with me. I'm trying not to get my hopes up but I'm going to stay off the beach and away from the swamp for a few days (which will be hard, believe me, especially since I have so little time left with the ocean!) and see if they go away. Cross your fingers for me!

So I couldn't go to the beach today. Instead, I sat at the table on my back porch - a lovely little area overlooking the sea and surrounded by potted plants - and filled out my course evaluation and then read my book while the sun set and the waves rolled in. It is a fantastic book for reading in this beautiful spot, and for reading at all while you're travelling, especially alone, especially for a long time, especially if you are interested in spiritual and religious things. It's called Eat Pray Love, and I'm the third person in the group to read this exact copy, the first two loved it so much. I'm almost done with it and I'm at that point that I get to with books where I don't want to put it down but I also want to read very slowly because I don't want it to be over. I also ate lots of chocolate eggs. The left over easter candy is ridiculously cheap right now and I cannot stop eating them. Well, now I can because they are all gone.

One really amazing thing happened today, also: Rachel decided to come with me to Uluru after all! We booked our tickets today. It was more money than I've ever spent in a single sitting but we've got spots on the tour and plane tickets there and back. All we need now is accommodation! I'm so excited! I still need to figure out what else I want to do before I go home, and when exactly I'm going home, but I'm getting to Uluru and I have someone to go with and I am happy.

The rest of this week is looking really fantastic, too: tomorrow I'm going water-skiing with Valissa and maybe some other researchers and people. Friday we're going to the rugby in Perth, Saturday is Berenice's house warming, Sunday we are having a Crepe party with the two French girls and their Italian friend (and I will attempt to speak French!), and then hopefully sometime next week we are going down to Denmark and the Treetop walk. Somewhere in there I have to work 40 hours a week and write my paper. Ah! I will make it work. I will start right now. I will be motivated, and not get distracted. Wish me luck!

I love and miss you all and thank you for being there for me.